Goodbye Craycroft

Well, it is over.  Somehow the past three years completely flew by, and I just cannot really believe it.  My co-workers completely spoiled me - a delicious, Mexican-themed potluck, a gorgeous and tasty chocolate cake Maria made, a thoughtful card and gift, and lots of laughs, hugs, and fake crying/whining :)  I love these people.  We have seen each other at our best and our worst.  We have met and cared for some amazing kids.  We have worked together in life-threatening emergencies. We have learned and grown into better healthcare providers.  We have attended funerals.  We have laughed, and we have cried.  Thank you for loving and caring for me until the end.  You are a hard bunch to leave.

Working on Craycroft (the name of the my unit, which houses a mix of oncology, hematology, nephrology, and endocrinology patients) was a gift.  It was a paradox most of the time.  Challenging and enjoyable.  Exhausting and rewarding.  Heart-breaking and life-changing.  There were nights when I left and cried the whole way home.  There were shifts where I left with my heart filled to the brim, unable to imagine doing anything else as a job.  But mostly it was somewhere in between.  One thing that never fluctuated was the support, encouragement, and teamwork of my co-workers.  I could not have asked for a better group of people to work with.  I know there will be nursing jobs out there for me, jobs that I may even love, but I will never be able to replace the people I have worked with.  The following is a collection of lessons learned, memories made, and a little humor (okay sarcasm) in between.  Disclaimer: If you do not work on Craycroft, you may not fully appreciate this.  

Things I Will Not Miss

• A new fever in the middle of the night with a double lumen Broviac
• Floating!!!
• Working on nights when Starbucks isn't open and resorting to cafeteria coffee
• When patients (or their parents) use the call light like a game show buzzer
• Bedside monitors when they are completely unnecessary
• Resident orders.
• Calling certain doctors at night....I won't name any names.....
• Getting a call from lab that you screwed something up
• PEWS
• The smell of Cefepime pee or C diff poop
• When Meditech goes down
• Upstream occlusion with bubbly fluids.  

Things I Learned

• Sometimes there are no words you can say to the parents, but you willingness to stand there in that silence means a lot
• Kids are incredibly resilient and do beat odds.
• There is no good reason why kids die from cancer.
• Patience.  Lots and lots of patience.
• Teamwork and not keeping score.  You never know when you are going to need someone to help you out.
• I am capable of far more than I ever thought I was.
• Stressful situations magnify everything.   I have seen them bring some people together, and tear others apart.  
• When in doubt, ask for a second opinion.  Or third.  There are no stupid questions (okay there are a FEW stupid questions :)
• Having co-workers you trust and respect makes a huge difference.
• Emergency situations suck, but they remind you that you really do play a role in saving lives.
• Life is precious - don't take it for granted.

You Know You Work in Craycroft When....

• you go to other units and cannot stand the beeping monitors and that everyone is on isolation.
• the charge nurses are the best - willing to help out, available, and have your back.
• it is normal for all the kids to be bald.
• giving blood, platelets, and chemotherapy are daily occurrences.
• only a handful of people are comfortable starting a peripheral IV because everyone has central lines.
• you just have to laugh about families requesting "a room with a better view" 
• the plan of care is dictated by the patient's hemoglobin, platelets, and ANC
• you have attended patients' funerals.
• everyone works together - answering call lights, admitting patients, responding to emergent situations, etc.
• you have the best co-workers ever.

It's been a good go.  Goodbye Craycroft.